Being Known, vulnerable and humbled

I just got back from my first visit to Fresno. This past week has been crazy, a lot has happened. I hung out with a couple of my close friends growing up. Then I flew to Fresno to get a glimpse of what my life could look like in the future. Then I hung out with my sisters and caught up with them. 

It was really refreshing to be around people that know me. A place where I am known and don`t have to worry about how to act or what to wear. People who have known  me all of my life. It is also draining to be around those people cause I haven`t been around my close girlfriends and just my sisters in a long time; there is a lot of talking that is involved. I hope that this next week when I go home I can continue to hang out with close friends and be surrounded by familiar faces. It is hard living in a city of strangers with few familiar faces. It has been good but sometimes lonely. 

Right now I am struggling with the unknown future. I feel like it is time to begin something new. There is this ministry in Fresno, CA that I feel a ton of peace about doing next year. Things have kind of fell into place and I can see how God has been changing my heart to prepare me for something like this. I am just worried that if it doesn`t work out that I will have many questions for God about how I misunderstood the peace and confirmation. I feel like through this process of deciding to pursue this path I have been humbled. challanged and vulnerable. I know it has caused me to grow in ways I wouldn`t have otherwise. It has allowed me to see and desire to live in the states for now.  I am just not good at waiting.